Jimney Credit
THE FLOOR by Jimney Credit
THE FLOOR Podcast: Episode 8
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THE FLOOR Podcast: Episode 8

Standard Deviation

In statistics, we use Normal (capitalized) to describe the typical distribution.

Outliers are exceptions.

The degree to which most people differ from Normal is called a standard deviation.

In quantifiable terms like height, weight or number of wildly unsuccessful interviews, we all deviate from Normal expectations.

By the way, many interviews aren’t what you think. 

Competitors might hold you hostage, lured to their office with a view of Central Park, under the guise of a job opening that may never have existed in the first place.  Your knowledge can and will be used against you.

The clock is ticking.  My department is running out of trading floor space and patience. My unrushed interviewing obviously drives them crazy.  My guru is gone.  It’s sink or swim time, which reminds me of slimy Squid.

Squid went to a big competitor downtown, so I naturally accept his dinner invitation to a French restaurant. The junior trader job never comes up.

“Where is Bear on Public Service New Hampshire bonds?  What is Nick doing with Macy’s coupons and zeros?”  Squid drills me on the Bear Stearns axe sheet, not me.

I get up very quietly from the table and leave Squid alone, shocked by my insubordination. “This is not an interview.”  It’s time for my next move.

You don’t have to fit any particular mold, but if you cave easily to pressure like a bitch, much more of it will come.  If you allow people to interview you like a naïve fool, those too will continue. Abnormality is your differentiating strength, not a hinderance.

Flinch Normally

This growing mortgage backed securities (or MBS) market is hot in 1991. The trading desk is on the opposite side of the floor, but its bankers sit behind me.

A small MBS group structures bond issues manually, one file at a time. They lump tons of individual residential mortgages together into a pool, for resale as a bundled instrument. Mortgage-backed bonds throw off cash distributions from homeowners.

Their boss Warren Spector visits them daily. The guy with the oversized glasses eventually invites me to his corner office for an interview after the market closes.

I prepare for my chance to jump ship, by studying him first, the mortgage backed bond market second and my tie selection last. It was deeply discounted at Macy’s

After a few years on the New York Stock Exchange and junk bond desk, my skin has thickened considerably. I don’t scare easily when he enters the room yelling.

I listen to my prospective new boss intently. I am auditioning as his next apprentice, the protective troll running interference under his mortgage-backed bridge. Be tough!

My direct MBS product knowledge and immediate utility to Warren Spector are negligible at this stage. My stoic lack of alarm and basic trading knowledge are my only transferrable skills. Normal people would not handle this screaming well.

I prove my impermeable nature by sitting attentively through his rant, facially empathizing with my interviewer.

The product and people in question are different, but the bullshit is the same.

My rare and curated ability to handle dramatic histrionics is being tested. I wear my game face for tonight’s try-outs. Warren’s fury must be genuine. This is his sport, not theatre.

I can only imagine what he’s like on a daily basis. But anything is better than festering in the junk department at this point. Get me out!

While Warren barks about the frustrations of his long trading day, I do not flinch. Suddenly, he stops screaming and steps back curiously. Warren shrugs and grins. The entire thing was an act.

“You started too young, far too jaded!” was Warren’s diagnosis. “I need you scared of me. Most normal people jump or at least wince, whenever I raise my voice. That’s simply not you. You belong on a desk. Just not mine.”

Normal is under-rated. The standard deviation is probably just enough. I got extra.

Regardless, these interviews must continue. Bankers Trust is next.

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